Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
Our hot neighbor just came over and asked for a toilet plunger...not so hot anymore
Any little, cute, petite blondes with you?
Nah, I got some slutty brunettes though.
I had to throw up. it was the only way to avoid kissing her after she swallowed..
There's two girls at the bar sniffing each others boobs.
well i just got discharged from the hospital after getting pegged in the head by a t-shirt gun so thats how my night was.
There was definitely a significant amount of cookie dough in my bra
alll i remember is comming back downstairs, his pants were off and he was aplauding me
She was about to leave with you until you started singing "You Hoes Ain't Loyal" in her face
Well, I sent nudes with an Elmo t shirt on the floor... so there's that.
I am talking to a naked lesbian about robots. I think this means I win life.
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
I broke my wrist trying to give him a blow job...
And this is why we can’t have nice things
Did you have a good sleep?
if a good sleep includes waking up cuddling a bottle of wine I had a GREAT sleep
btw...it's noon and i'm sitting here drinking wine and eating pixie stix. I really need to find something to do...
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