Tears do usually get me what I want. That and oral sex.
You cheat on me once, shame on me. You cheat on me with a white girl, it's fucking over
quitting drinking is the number 5 new years resolution but number 4 is enjoying life more which one do you think im going to pick
i'm almost done photoshopping my face on his wife. it's a done deal
I take back everything I said about communal showers
Everything tastes like hotdogs and shame.
she asked how her costume looked and all i could say was bars are dark right?
The bed I'm sleeping in has a headboard only handcuffs could love. I'm gonna pick up a local dude and wreck that.
So apparently we wrote "Lube Shopping" in Paula's diary on every friday for the rest on the year....
How exactly does a handjob become fancy?
Blueberry lube, and champagne.
I've just had my first cup of coffee in a month and I moaned at the first drink and honestly I think this is the most sexual expreiance in 6 months
i feel like ive seen the light, but not in the nasty christian way. thats gross. say no to jesus, kids
Fun. You missed it. Michael broke a door with his erection.
I just used a bag of jelly beans as an arm weight...I'm not sure what to think of myself
He only has one ball. it was like fucking a cyclops.
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