I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
he looked upset that i wasn't completely shaven. i reminded him he had begged. and beggars can't be choosers.
I was to drunk to drive all the way up there, so we just had rough phone sex instead
Dude feel your hair right now it feels so weird like pasta
Will you be topless? That will affect my answer.
having my hair in braids makes puking so easy. i am being an indian every halloween
We shoved chex mix between her tits for her own survival.
I just headbutted my cat because he was trying to eat my bacon.
Just threw up in the waiting room. I can't believe I have to switch dermatologists again.
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
I refuse to have sex with you and your eBay condoms.
No longer is one of my lifelong dreams to ride in a kangaroo pouch. You have eternally ruined that for me. Thank you.
The crowd is chanting "we want sex!" There's a man dressed as bacon. That is all
well my grandpa saw your dick pic, so why don't you tell me how my day is going
I swear we were drugged last night
We had a 130$ tab bitch. We drugged ourselves.
Randomize
