Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
Nothing screams don't date me louder then having your baby as your profile pic
Wow, haven't had to deal with the 'stoned at the dinner table' scenario in a while
You tried to convince our cab driver that your $2 bill was worth $11.70
I bought a 9 dollar purse from payless so if I throw up in it tomorrow, no biggie.
Not sure if you carved a butthole or vagina in that pumpkin but that didn't stop high Phil from mounting. My study group is horrified.
By the third Id pass back i figured the bouncer had fucked one of us.
I just ran into the married chick you banged 2 years ago at our apt! She asked me if I could get her coke! Memories bro. Memories
Very impressive. My GPA is the same amount of orgasms I can offer tonight (valid only tonight): 3.5
Last night I dressed up as a cowgirl and walked into McDonald's. I bought 20 mcribs. There's pictures
I don't know but this 12 year old kid is soaking up all of our bad morals like a super tampon on the second day of my period
We will go to karaoke
Okay, well, i'm covered in paint, haven't showered & have already been drinking, so if I fall on the floor in a blaze of depeche mode & beer tears, you can't pretend you don't know me
Remember that time we turned a can of Axe body spray into a flame thrower?
Damn that brownie almost kicked my ass. I'm not sure if my flight home lasted 10 minutes or 10 days..
Look idk the rules and regulations of our freindship...but I need you to carry me to my car.
Randomize
