Kind of a slow process. Played 9 holes with her yesterday. Wish one of them was hers
you need to know that there is a kid here wearing an i mosh for Jesus shirt
giving a 30 min presentation still drunk is like giving birth, upside down in a pit of snakes while being on fire.
the only thing i remember last nigh is talking to some chick for thirty minutes about cheese.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We did lines off of a Whitney Houston CD case. That makes everything okay.
Hypothetically going to the gym on coke was a good idea
Someone is in my phone as "fireball girl" and keeps texting me. How do I go about finding out who it is?
I just had to call my mom to come pick me up stoned at a Lana's house and beg her to buy me Taco Bell. I'm graduating from college in 14 hours. Fuck
I spent the entire night stroking his hair. He was cool with it. Never thought a ginger stoner would help me work through my social anxiety but here we are.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No fair. I need a fuck buddy to entertain me till the power comes back on
I wanna die. I can't recall the last time I was happy that doesn't involve your hand touching my butt.
The cop busted in, made the music stop, and goes "GUYS LISTEN UP! DRINK, DO DRUGS, HAVE UNPROTECTED SEX, I DONT GIVE A FUCK, JUST QUIET DOWN!" Best. Cop. Ever.
im going to smoke a cigarette and reflect on my life choices
Responsible things to do when you're too hungover to get out of bed: Breast self exam.
He wanted me to do the rubix cube. He thought it was hot.
Randomize