During sex he started singing that song in Forgetting Sarah Marshall--"Inside of You"--by Russell Brand
I can only name 15 people I've had sex with - can I just start claiming that as my sex number?
Better skin, bigger boobs.. Birth control is INCREASING my chance of getting pregnant because people actually want to have sex with me now.
The class that normally occupies the room we use for my Monday class had to do posters as if for a Hamlet movie and they pick actors for each character and this person wrote "Robert D. Niro"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
if by 'bottleservice' you mean 'bringing beers in my purse' then yes, we are.
i just entered cocaine into my calorie counter.
He kept spanking me and talking about biomedical science.
Aw, you fucked a pre-med? you're moving up in the world!
I have to overdose on valtrex I had a rough weekend.
Ya well my good-girl image was pretty much blown when he found out I'm going to jail soon.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Quick question: how do I take a nice picture of my ass? I'm asking you because I figure with an ass like yours you're probably experienced.
I told you in the isle if you get the one that vibrates that I masturbating with it. Your fault.
Bullshit. You owe me a toothbrush.
quickly learned not to sleep with your roommate and work colleague in the same week
bonus check + party bus = big hot mess
dude, next time you say lets go on an adventure, tell me if there are going to be psychotrophics involved before hand.
OMG also, I'm sorry I tased you a lil
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