they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
All my problems are solved. I just got McDonalds and scratch off lottery tickets.
At the bar dressed as a taco. not a typo. Come down.
Like what kind of adult things? Whats more adult than drinking at 2pm on a monday?
We got a 5L jug of wine for 3 Euro. Italy was a good choice.
I woke up and took my shirt off, and there was what I was assume to be pieces of tree in my chest hair. Any ideas about that one?
Let's get one thing straight; we aren't in a relationship. We fuck and occasionally go to subway.
She sucked my dick and I swear I almost had to send a search party into her mouth to find it. IT WAS THAT AMAZING.
And dildos are 35% off. So. Ya know. Savings.
I thought I was pretty much sober now but then I realized I've been eating scrambled eggs with my hands...
And then after we fucked he wouldn't stop calling me "champ". It was like I had sex with an extremely attractive soccer coach
I've been sleeping with the same person for about two months now, I think I know a little bit about stability and commitment.
My moms new boyfriend looks like Stu Pickles if he was in a biker gang. He gave me free coke though, so come party?
WE HAVE WINE WHERE ARE YOU GUYS WE ARE BY THE GIANT EAGLE
its 11:20. i'm drunk in class flying paper airplanes for my final. what the fuck is my college experience right now?
Randomize
