Fiestas. Its like a classier verson of mardi gras.
so when am I gonna get some from you?
when you dick grows 3 inches
i actually just woke up with a lampshade on my head. god damn cliches.
I am too drunk to make real decisions. I had pop rocks all over my ass earlier. This is not a joke.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm on strict orders from her to keep sleeping with you until you give her a job next summer.
not sure how we got back down, broken rib says we didn't use stairs
Does taking an old homeless guy to the strip club, buying him lap dances, and calling him pops all night count as a good deed???
Would "deck the halls with penises " be an appropriate event title? I know peni is the plural but flow of the tongue as well
He recreated the night that started all my mothers days. We shared a joint, drank Boones Farm, and dry humped to the Beastie Boys. Then I cried over MCA's death. Best. Gift. Ever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I said his dick tasted like a Hawaiian Sweet Roll. And then I yelled MAHALO.
It's the 3rd day of the year and I've already sucked two dicks. New year same ole me.
I was intimate with him for twenty minutes and will be intimate with shame for twenty years.
I'm sorry I tried to stab you. I just really wanted those mozerella sticks.
then this guy just runs in screaming, "cant you see my daughter pissed herself???!!!" and that was the start of my 2016.
all i want is a guy to go down on me while i eat peanutbutter from a jar
Randomize