the best part about being a teacher is there are always 20 little kids around me to blame my farts on
the Monday before Thanksgiving is not a Monday at all. Just Thursday in Monday suit.
i hope not, i just know that at one point I was sitting on the bathroom floor eating bugles and crying because i had no one to show that it looked like I had witch nails when i stuck them on the ends of all ofmy fingers.
And I was the only one who felt it was dangerous to set the tv and blender on the ledge of the hot tub
Ahhh November 1st. National Untagging Day
He shaved off his eyebrows. This is not my life.
She just licked her nipple in public to get a free bar tab.
This is what you sent me from the other side of the pool, "Idk but thers a pool n l wanna get naked take off my trunks ill paddle with my dick"
I was dancing with a blow torch in one hand and a bowl of weed in the other
Best sex of my life. But I think it's because I like his apartment. Really nice bed sheets. High vaulted ceilings. I wanted to lay there forever.
You're getting old. Was it located in a nice school district for your future offspring?
Is it bad that I'm tindering right now? I'm naked on his couch while he's slaving over legal documents for work. And he doesn't have cable, so what else am I supposed to do?
I DID MY EXPERIMENTING. FOUR YEARS OF IT. IN HIGH SCHOOL.
If the sex wasn't incredible why would I compare it to cheesy tots
Some girls mom just approved of me banging her on Fb.... For the whole world to see.. I'm officially a god.
I need a job that does not involve working with people who wear animal costumes when they get fucked.
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