I masturbated on the webcams with my bf yesterday then typed without washing my hands first... then my roommate used my laptop it was pretty priceless
this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
My brother and I both agreed that your boobs are fake.
either she said she was feeling frisky or eating friskies..i was too drunk to understand.
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
Unemployment check just came in. As soon as I stop pretending I have morals I'm buying weed. Puff puff pass uncle sam.
Wearing a shark mask, slugging tequilla, in cowboy boots, and not minding that my spandex is on backwards. What are you up to?
We have bigger issues at hand... Does anybody know someone in the kalamazoo area that is missing a pair of stilts ?
preface to our conversation: my vagina hurts.
Sometimes I really think that if... When your stoned you have a catlike ability to just relax in any position
I don't know if I'm more excited about sex or that I have an excuse to smoke a cigarette
How's Vegas?
Woke up with a sculpture of my own head. Been trying to find Ashley for two days. so pretty not too bad.
I don't want a big night. But I am okay if we wake up in a penthouse at Crown Casino.
I accidentally stubbed my dick
What does that even mean?
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