Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
Sex on a kitchen table is not as amazing as they make is seem in the movies.
i just successfully used the word "hymen" in a paper...welcome to senior seminar in lit.
I concluded last night that you have no tear ducts, heart, or sense of any feeling.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude you were tripping so badly we put a pretend box around your head and you spoke silently for the rest of the night. I think pterodactyls were involved.
You were chugging tap water out of a running blender screaming "bubbles is Perrier mother fucker"
Honestly you'd think more guys would be happy to date a cute female dealer, but apparently something about safety or whatever
I've discovered my ability to crush a man's ego is greater than my hate for beer.
Came home from this girls horse at 6am to find a guy lighting off roman candles in front of my door. Best walk of fame I've ever had.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I ended up in th ER yelling my height weight and age
Literally told everyone you're my idol cause you ate a chicken nugget off a sword
You went home with a guy at 11... than returned to the bar at 1
Autocorrect changes "sex" to "sec". I have been so long without it my phone thinks I made a mistake.
Hey
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GODDAMNIT WHY AM I MISSING THIS
I didn’t want a minivan, but I have to admit it’s made it a lot easier to hook up with the dilfs at soccer tournaments
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