watching a depressing episode of spongebob while high is the most depressing thing i have ever experienced
Did you dl zombie porn on my computer?
Swine flu is the new snow day.
probably shouldnt have written that paper while wasted, its starts with once upon a time
i tried to stop you but you kept shouting "two birds with one stone!"
No dude, you can't hot box a bus shelter.
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
i tried to climb in the window in the limo because i wanted the driver to take me to get noodles. ive reached a new level of fat kid
I think we should bring back the casual nipple tassel
Just doin' what I do best: sitting in a stall in the class building's bathroom, pondering life and exploring deep, dark corners of the internet before class.
I am almost positive I asked to milk her when I was saying my goodbyes.
i'm sad to say... seems like women around here set up their armageddon booty calls ahead of time. wanna fill all these condoms with tequila and head downtown???
the fat lady is now rubbing her stomach and staring at me. I hate trains
trying to figure out what happened last night by looking around the apartment.
naked man under the piano. THE PLOT THICKENS.
You should have thought about how you were going to treat me before having me take photos of your asshole.
This is not my bathroom and these are not my pants