YEA!!! I'll throw you a non-baby shower.
Crown is evil. It plays hide and seek with my morals
Britney fell asleep on the couch in the foier, got up stripped then pissed on the floor. Then got dressed and went to sleep in it. Also downstairs toilet clogged. Not me. I will be gone by the time you get home from work. Have fun.
Thank you for leaving pool of vagina on my girlfriends carpet.
the cops didnt even wait to start drinking the confiscated alchohol from the party
as soon as his mom opened the door to let me in the house she asked if i would like a shot
it's gonna be a great weekend
this kid woke up on our hotel floor and doesnt know how he got here
on my way back.. me and that kid will be great friends
Beer Popsicles are better in theory
Besides. I seriously had a dream that George W Bush came over and slapped some tabs down on my kitchen counter and said "let's get juiced.". It was a sign to not get too fucked up
All I've had today is a brownie and a shot of Jack, so you know. I'm doing ok.
You are like the only girl I know who tells their booty call to go find another girl just cause you want more sleep.
The worst part was when I went to go spit it out and rinse my mouth, his grandpa was in the bathroom, so I had to fucking wait. It was awful. I finally ran to the kitchen and prayed his parents didn't come out of their room.
DROP EVERYTHING! Gatta go get tested for herpes, lets make an adventure out of it.
Girl you know I'm an advocate of debauchery but you might wanna check yoself.
You start to question your morals when you wake up at 430 and there's three people naked...that you don't no
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