Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(812): View more from Indiana

her eyes looked like someone had poured fruit punch in them. needless to say we had a good time.

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(310): View more from California

what kind of morning-after breakfast implies 'thanks for the sex, but i'm not gonna call you ever again'?

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(513): View more from Ohio

i wish sherlock holmes were still around today... he'd be able to find my g-spot.

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(225): View more from Louisiana

I puked in the AC vent. thing are gonna get ugly come summertime.

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(770): View more from Georgia

I didn't wanna be that girl that took a shit in the ocean..

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(636): View more from Missouri

I'm still tasting pancake mix. I think this may actually be a serious medical problem...

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(860): View more from Connecticut

Legitimate logistical question....how did you pee in your duct tape dress?

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(479): View more from Arkansas

I am actually offended he hasn't asked me to sleep with him yet to get better grades...I wanted the whole college experience.

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(575): View more from New Mexico

Slammed 3 beers and just bowled a 129\nI guess alcohol IS the answer

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