he just said he was sorry he wasnt been able to come by more often coz things are really crazy with that girl
you mean his girlfriend
If it has a penis then it will be stupid. Just how it works.
but the lizard people decide everything anyway
so my aunt is sitting on the couch, eating a brownie and watching the biggest loser saying how it's not that hard to eat healthy
man i love america
my Prof for my bio lab has his lab coat collar popped. it's 8 am and im too hungover for this guy
Dude, we totally smoked up inside a church organ last night. Add this to the epic list.
He came to my house drunk at two a.m., got in the hot tub, refused to get out until he smoked a blunt, and said "That's what brothers and sisters are for."
just had to sit in the middle of an aisle in stop and shop because we're too hungover and needed to take a break.
He literally cocked blocked all the dudes that tried to talk to the girls he was with, and they all loved him.
Same guy who tossed the brunet over his shoulder as they left screaming "Bring me my lucky shovel!"
I couldn't do it. You can't break up after that many orgasms. It's physically impossible.
There is a guy in class using a wine bottle as a water bottle. Welcome to the Faculty of Environment.
last thing I remember is yelling 'sit on my face' through a traffic cone
He wants to make me arch my back "like I'm having an exorcism". Not sure if I'm turned on or freaked out.
i just used your hair clip to unclog my bong. i miss you so much!
His dick is social distance approved
Social distance approved?
big enough for me to fuck from six feet away
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