All time low... just gave a strip tease to the theme song from Law&Order SVU.
he just kept saying "come on iron man, you can do this!" to himself the whole time..
Last thing I remember was you straddling a guy in a wheelchair on the dance floor.
Ya. I was the definition of a shit show. I woke up outside my door when my alarm went off
Bitches at mcdonalds acting like they never seen a girl puke in her own coat pocket before
I was just handed jelly beans by a guy in a penguin costume. Standby for confirmation on if they are actually drugs.
someone to text and fuck? since when does that constitute a relationship?
since 2006
I told him id do anything with him and he said angry pirate? So I said okay. Never seeing him again.
What's an angry pirate?
You dont want to know. If someone offers say no. Never ever do the angry pirate. Ever.
Please tell me there isn't another video of me on the toilet...
The video of him doing the dougie made me telling him I didn't want a relationship, just his virginity so much easier.
That awesome feeling when you are pooping on the same toilet that nobel laureates have pooped on
Who says there aren't gentlemen anymore? My one night stand warmed up my car for me
Dude come to her party. Someone just took a body shot of rubbing alcohol
Guess who's the proud owner of her very own foxtail butt plug!!
I just realized how terrible that was... I was drumming on your penis to a song about Baby Jesus.
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