they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
It was like the Ritz Carlton of jails. I got introduced to our criminal system the right way.
I mean this holiday was built on cheap beer, shitty whisky, and processed meat... and I fully plan to honor that
In the ER. 2nd degree burns. Drunken attempt to make gasoline scented candles.
I've reached the slutty point of no return. And it feels like multiple orgasms and coke lines
Doubtful. That seems irresponsible. The 4th will kill you if you stopped drinking until then. Let's think logically.
I may be Daddy's little princess, but doesn't mean I can't be the blowjob queen.
I just smoked a bowl with the lady who runs the special olympics. Your move.
Apparently last night I yelled "the cops were called on a mother fucker and that mother fucker is me." And then proceeded to exorcise a sandwitch.
I just made my mom buy me lube. I've reached a new level of broke.
I can't believe he's mad at you for not remembering your fake anniversary.
Why the fuck is there a goat in the kitchen
I have to sleep with him. We're too much alike. It's like clash of the titans, except instead of clashing, he's putting it in me.
What is ur current declared sexuality for my bingo board
Randomize
