Do they make some cleansing product for your soul? Like mouthwash that makes you not a skank? Or is that what religions for?
Eh, i think it's called sobriety. But its not fun.
he told us the story of how he fought ketchup, mustard, and thomas the train engine all in one night. if that doesn't sound like an acid trip i dont know what does.
Um don't talk to me about fat. I just used my chip bag to cover up all my candy wrappers in the garbage.
Well he paid for dinner, so I paid for the Plan B, but the parking ticket I got is totally his responsibility.
I may still return these pants. Depends how much they smell like alcohol by tmrw morning. I've already spilled once.
If the EMT's ask later... I had 5 hour energy for breakfast and Four Loko for dinner... It might be important for them to know that
You guys crashed sarahs vespa into a snowbank and its still there. not cool.
I am burnt. Have a black eye. Face dove into the grass and got pissed on. Time of my life. God Bless the USA.
how is telling me how long you drunkenly fucked someone supposed to make me miss you?
Good news. I heard back from the doctor and I don't have a liver problem.
...yet.
Just tapped my penis on the head and said "this will be your year buddy."
she opened a can of olives, drained the juice and poured ranch dressing in. oh and 'croutons' (saltines) on top...
sooo the guy I beat last night in strip pong is the manager's husband at my new job...
Either he pets my cat or this deal is null
hey at least you are getting hit on, i spent all day researching cat sedatives
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