It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
not only did i climb through the window at 4 am but here i am 4 hours later for my interview at the mall and i'm staring in the dark pet store barking at puppies
I'm giving up shame for lent. Here come the best 40 days and nights of my life.
Ive been tazing him too get him immuned. He will be unstopable.
Boxed wine mondays was one of our finer ideas
threw up outside of the dorms in the parking lot in the pouring rain on the first day of class, i'd say summer is off to a good start.
Realized it was likely to be cursed, didn't want my own Johnson magically turning into some sort of fire breathing reptile and eating me
That is an interesting fear as well as image
Nick is about to bring home a woman who is 39, a mother, and, by all accounts, FUCKING HOMELESS. Will update as details become available.
I'm wearing a suit and have no chance of getting laid or robing a casino. I consider this opportunity a failure
I am pretty sure I just put SoCo in the bird feeder
I tried to light my cup as a bong. I'm done drinking
I may be going to Mexico. I just met a drug dealer at a strip club. Seems legit.
I traded some nice guy at the bar ten bucks and a pack of cigarettes for his leather jacket. I'm pretty sure I win at life. Whoever is in my phone as Tyler Durden, I thank you.
I woke up with sticky red stuff all over my sheets, face, and chest. Apparently after I blacked out I thought eating ribs in bed was a good idea
Randomize
