Sandra Bullock looks like the most recent Michael Jackson
Anddd after the worst sex of my life, he said.."do you mind taking off the condom, tying it up, and throwing it at the door?" Weird.
i wanted to be an indian when i was a child. apparently you cannot grow up to be an indian.
Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
There's a 24 hour period after giving head where you can't eat penis shaped food without me laughing at you
She threw up in the hot tub how's your night
Have you ever tried running while drinking 151?
Mym mom just came downstairs as I got ghome ans I'm trying to act SO CASUAL as i stabdh here hut icant help bur be like 'girl where's ther Turkey sandwiche s' haahaa
I literally need you to talke care of me soooo9o9oooooo drubj gril makin a sabdwiche. SO far its judst bred and paper towel...
Are you having sex right now? Or is the apt just swaying rhythmically on its own? Either way, awesome.
I LOVE YOU SO MUCH I'M ON A WILD DICK CHASE FOR YOU. How many lesbians do YOU know that would do that? HOW MANY????
Also, I found your gauge.
I found it under my pillow like a gift from the Sex Fairy.
I basically have sex lined up for me in three different countries. If that's not a feat I don't know what is
We hooked up in his car and afterwards he cried. I think I need to find a new hookup...
She found the planted magnum condom..once she figured it out it was too late.
Is it weird that my ex and the dude I'm talking to now both only have one testicle? Apparently I've found my type..
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