There are 3 speedbumps now up. Think you can manage the urge to piss on them?
Aw shit! That's like putting me a in a room full of Captiain Crunch Donuts and Jasper Hale and not letting me put my mouth on either.
5 years of college and never once did they teach us how to respond when you overhear a group of 7th grade boys who are in your class talking about how you're definitely DTF
children are so perceptive these days... and horny
You can only be slapped by Eastern European waitresses so many times. I guess they don't want my huge cock in their iron curtain
I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
Satisfying Perfect Camera Moments
you don't seem to understand just how much pasta i spilled on my bed last night.
I still cannot believe I yelled at every guy at the bar "you wanna get in this clam?!"
pretty sure I offered to blow her dad. she's not speaking to me & he won't stop winking at me.
He asked me if I could call his penis destroyer... Uhh SOS.
you described his penis as a "portable fishing pole"
This Dog Travel Carrier is a Must
Yeah well I used to see how many bud lights I could slam down during the pledge of allegiance, my record was 4, but I could do better now.
Sorry I never showed up last night. It was between spending time with you and our freinds or having violent multiple orgasims. I chose the low road.
I couldn't tell you were laughing too hard
Dude I thought I set my hair on fire. I wasn't laughing I was screaming.
He stumbled into my room, flopped on my bed, shoes on my pillow and asked me for a juice box. Then fell asleep with the juice box on his forehead.
Trying to ignore the fact that a kid I hooked up with twice just gave me spare keys to his house ... and car.
Is it a problem if I'm trying to condition Goodbye Horses to trigger an erection?