who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
I want Jason Statham to talk British to my vagina.
i wanted to be an indian when i was a child. apparently you cannot grow up to be an indian.
I just egged your windshield and it froze on contact. Have fun with that.
I'm sorry. I think I have multiple personalities. Or it was the acid. Either way. I'm sorry.
He sent me an email apologizing for sleeping with her...and by that I mean he sent a picture of his dick to my school e-mail
Shot gunning beers for breakfast. You better be ready for today.
Please note: when a bouncer tells you to leave, pointing out that their career path makes them a much better judge what to do will not make you friends
Hot freshmen.....hot freshmen chicks everywhere
You say this every welcome week, bro.
Maybe you need to change your pickup move. The "hey check these out" titty flash gets you the wrong kinda man.
You kept chewing on the empty milk carton and saying "kitty" over and over again. It was an interesting night.
Like not to be gross, he was eating me out while I was smoking a bowl. It was like a rap video
it was like reliving my childhood drunk at a bar.
Don’t say some truly stupid shit like that to me. In a kitchen. Where the knives are kept
Did we go to Florida? My missing thong and DL just arrived in the mail. Return address was Tampa.
Randomize
