I've replaced the bottom of the food pyramid with alcohol.
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
wicked high...have munchies. cherry flavor lube. problem solved.
I'll name the documentary, "The Adventures of Megan's Vagina"
you left a note on your car that said " please dont tow, im to drunk to drive. safety first!"
All I remember is saying that "fire will make it all better"
Never again. Her vagina looked like a sad old man.
She's trying to figure out what kind of dinosaur I am... Yay codeine.
I legit just woke up on my couch, snuggled up next to some guy who's wearing my roommate's pink bathroble. What the fuck do they put in those shots?
Sometimes you gotta say "hey, its been a long semester. Let's puke before 10"
We're 17 hours into a 3 day weekend, and he's already shitfaced. He fell of the dock TWICE and insisted on wearing a life jacket on dry land.
His new place is a molesden. Like a hole in the ground. It's frightening how oddly private it is.
It rubs the lotion on it's foreskin...
My goal this weekend is to get a number that goes with the penis I take him.
Aspirations
So I got this new job… ever been fucked in a corner office before?
Plus he is a pilot so I could give him flight dome
Randomize
