I just woke up in the 4th floor lounge at 5:30AM with my ipod on to springsteen and a condom on
Probably, but last night was a special kind of drunk. It was a "let's see how drunk I can get without killing myself" drunk.
when a 14 year old is judging you, you know you've had too much to drink
Went to my car this morning. Found a waffle from Waffle House in the front seat. No idea how it got there. So hung over I ate it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
On that note; HAPPY 21: THE SEQUEL from the back of an ambulance!!
idk what id do withouhrh yoy btro
I feel like it'll be a success as long as she doesn't end up dead in a ditch. There has to be a line somewhere.
I think I'm still drunk and I think you were in my dream (sadly, it was not a sexual bill murray one).
Whos eating a bunch of acid and watching fireworks tomorrow? This guy. Thats who.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
First sunburned tits of the season. And it's only April... I feel like it's going to be a good summer.
Of course I have to cross through a walk for hunger
He lit a candle for the mood and ended up lighting my hair on fire while we were hooking up...moodkiller
I want to but I can't have a boner while doing a install and working with a customer
We got a noise complaint for vacuuming too much but not for getting really high and yelling about peanut butter
Even if they did assume we were doing kinky shit, it's not like they're gonna be like, "HALT SATAN! INTAKE SOME JESUS AND VOMIT YOUR SINS!"
Randomize