drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
I may not go down in history, but i will definitely go down on your little sister.
I was at circle k buying gas and this girl in a papa johns uniform comes up and is like " I've got a bunch of extra pizzas. Large peperoni for $5." then she went to her trunk and pulled one out. It felt like a drug deal for a fat person
I wish Denzel Washington would coach my flip cup team..
its a sex-hate relationship...no love involved
Dwarf fight at five guys. Today was a good day.
I found out why they kept calling her "CD". It was short for "Crab Dip". You're fucked.
On the back of that comment, I've formed a theory that as a result of my brainwashing your drunk self actually believes that beards are your calling.
I didn't even have time to sit down and the nurse was like: ''You've been having unprotected sex.'' HOW DOES SHE KNOW?!?
We got back from the bar and started watching bizzare foods, which subsequently led to the consumption of large amounts of rancid lunch meat and small insects.
Of all the things that can be stripped of me i'll be damned if it's my vanity
He just pulled out my weave during sex....needless to say I'm embarrassed and in need of another shot pronto
I could be busy drinking my face off and getting red white and bruised per usual
Question: what's the protocol for seeing your mistress walking alongside her clueless boyfriend? If you could answer this ten minutes ago, that'd be great.
He and I didn't so much date, as watch cartoons and go down on each other.
Randomize
