whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
I got so drunk I pissed the bed last night. He still likes me. He's a keeper
He is a keeper. You on the other hand are not.
So I'm cool with the whole break up, but it sure is a shame we didn't get to use those handcuffs.
I've officially moved beyond college drinking. I just got business drunk at an internship seminar.
We discussed our relationship status. We're dating exclusively. And the conversation was followed by him saying "C'mon baby, let's make you orgasm!" .....I'm gonna marry him.
Just made my alarm the Lion King song. Too excited about waking up to sleep.
I just licked the seasoning off all the doritoes in the bag. Tell me when I should stop drinking or I'll just move on to the sunchips
It was only 12:11 and I needed to make a Pepto Latte and call it a night, I don't remember that being part of my new years resolution.
No no don't get confused. We do chemistry homework on Thursdays. We screw on Fridays. Other than that, Words With Friends is our only communication five days a week. We are NOT dating.
he's like a horny 3rd grader on cocaine. he needs a leash
For the sake of being nice I congratulated her and she replied with something along the lines of that I need to stay away from him and not touch him ever. I really wanted to be like "been there, done that" but my New Years resolution was to not start any cat fight over boys with small dicks before noon
How is someone going to pee on the floor two days in a row? Fuck this place.
There's a video of you almost falling asleep in a bar stool listening to Jimmy Buffett. Nekkid.
I forgot to lock the door last night. I woke up cuz a guy opened my bedroom door, asked me who I was and where he was. And there was another guy standing in the living room asking me if I knew what apartment "Travis" lives in.
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