so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
FYI: if you have sex in your room with the light on, we can totally see your shadows from the parking lot
Your boyfriend has good rhythm though.
took shots out of a medicine cup. i can get used to college.
Just taught my suite how to queef. I feel like i'm back in 9th grade!
pre-gaming in the library. just gonna keep going until i'm too drunk to keep working and then i'll be there.
I am way too attached to fictional lesbians.
You didn't act like you were blacked out yesterday...
I didn't know
It's gay pride weekend and Father's day.. So in honor of the occassions I am now BI
I mean thanks for the bj but i wanna forget everything that happened last night between 11 and 5
A big toe in my vag is not foreplay.
Sometimes I just want to serenade his penis with cheesy 80s songs.
Why is there puke in my guitar?
Because you puked in your guitar.
Just put on slippers before underwear so you know where my priorities are
Just to let you know we went to the circus yesterday...in case you didn't remember
we went to the skate park then back to her house for dinner, and somehow that ended with her making me blueberry pancakes at 2am
Randomize
