when I woke up I found a half-eaten cherry toaster strudel sandwich with bacon in the middle.
after he came i started crying. just to fuck with his head.
Is it wierd that you're going to be my best man and you've fucked my wife?
I know eh? If a man wants to pay 7 bucks to see some boobies he should be allowed to do so in peace.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Moral of the story: don't get pregs or your chances in the beer league are over
Drunkenly auctioned off my bed for 3 tequila shots
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
Congrats on having the best tasting nipple at the bar last night.
well that explains the french fry and ketchup packet rolled into the wasitband of my sweats. thank you drunk me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Should I go sleeveless of strapless?
Hmmm, it doesn't matter. You're gonna be topless by the end of it.
Moral of the story: fuckboys never change
How does one acquire holy water?
Aww well I’m kinda unsober so probably best
I offered to go down on her because of how impressive her theatre career was. Stop letting me talk to lesbians.
You'll be pleased to know I just had an elaborate day dream about your penis. you were there too.
Randomize