can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
I now officially know the distance between my two boobs is one twizzler.
There was jim beam in your oven. I just preheated it.
like literally i think i'm sweating out semen right now
Plus apparently whenever one of her friends loses their virginity they get a party with a funfetti cake which I found funny
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
You leave me no choice. Your vagina is grounded. It can just sit there and think about what it's done.
I hooked up with some guy to get over my ex last night. I was terrified until we started doing naked pushups.
She actually was beyond drunk but she for some reason kept calling herself a demigod and made me drive her to a bookstore
You kept asking her which dick pills worked the best. She's a grandmother.
I'm convinced that the Christmas lights in my room contributed to the great sex.
who are you talking about my vagina to?!
all I got out of honors convocation is I've hooked up with a lot of smart guys
What is the acceptable way to offer a trade of sex for a few hours of body heat?
Speaking of dumpster fires, your ex tried to add me on Facebook
Randomize
