i have some very unhappy turtles in my backseat
did she really think she could get into the club & no one would recognize her from 16 & pregnant???
He shit in the bushes next to the pool at the Venetian, after throwing up in the hallway. You really can do anything in Vegas.
Bro what are you doing Thursday the day before I go to jail??
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
A guy wearing a shirt that says "eat shit and die motherfucker" just held open a door for me. He's got manners.
C'mon pople!!! THursday afternoon isnot gonna drinkin itself!!!
School starts Thursday. Don't fling yourself out of the car to throw up screaming "classy" before I park this time.
It's a new year.
fucked a girl in the dry storage closet at work. knocked over a whole rack of tomato paste and pinto beans. and also i really hope my manager doesn't review this footage from the security camera
That was the second worst thing to happen to my asshole.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Who the fuck gets injured on a merry-go-round? HOW IS IT POSSIBLE??
PICK ME UP NOW I THINK THIS MOTEL IS A CRIME SCENE. also congrats on your engagement i saw the post on my phone while i was climbing out the window
Oh my god if I have to go on fetlife to find a guy who will fuck me right around here, I'm going to scream.
I told you for Halloween we just need to let the loins free! Let the girth come to us in a flock, drenched with passion!
I'm rolling and just noticed that the thread count on these sheets is horrendous.
How did I end up in some random dudes car?
Some guy came up to you and asked if you knew how to drive stick.
Randomize