How's tricks little girl?
Trix are for kids, old man.
we're getting ready to take strippers to breakfast. I love my life.
road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
apparently he thought telling me 'the weasel wants to come out to play' would somehow convince me to go down on him
All I know is that we apparently made a drink we named The Single Girl which is rum, vodka, grain alcohol, and sprite and rolled around in the backyard.
Despite fighting the urge to vomit throughout the whole thing, I think that interview went really well!
I'm tangled in a fishing net down at the harbor. This has nothing to do with Captain Morgan. Bring wirecutters.
You can't spell "party" without "RA."
You know what else you can't spell it without? "Gonna get fired."
I smell like hot dogs and captain morgan it's 11:20 am what is my life
Look, as flattering as it is, I'm getting a little tired of being everyone's go-to girl for a threesome.
Just got a snapchat from him that was a video of with the caption "my new apartment" in Brazil. I think we might not be seeing eachother anymore.
I'll just go on tinder. Seeking strong male to help take apart ikea furniture and move. I'll touch your dick.
He walked into me masturbating to a framed picture of Bill Murray riding a t-rex
Just bought shot glasses from the thrift store. I think the guy buying a winter coat was even judging me.
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