The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
i just looked up and i was like omg ballsack and then i didnt know what to do
Just went through ex bf's and hook up buddys and liked pictures of them on facebook. A friendly reminder that I will be back in for the holidays
If a young child walked up to you and grabbed your penis, you'd feel violated too.
When she was dating that guy she told me If they broke up, I would receive a call and no matter what I was doing I'd have to go over a fuck her. It's like being an EMT for sex.
Totally just sport flirted the shit out of a girl on a wheelchair. I've done my good deed for the day.
I left puerto rico a week ago and my vagina still smells like coconut.
I felt so bad for you. Drunk Rachael wanted nothing more than to crawl into the cop car and give you a hug. Luckily Mollied/Barred out Rachael convinced Drunk Rachael this was a terrible idea. So I ran. I have your keys btw
I am too young to be this hungover
Is this your way of saying you want a sober 19th?
The cops walked in and cracked up bec he was passed out on the couch in a pink tutu.
For sure. I'm slow cooking a 6 pound pork shoulder wrapped in bacon. If that doesn't scream "guys I'm going into culinary arts lets get drunk" I'm not sure what does.
It's really hard to masturbate now that I live with girls who actually function before 11 am.
Doing a walk of shame at Wal-Mart at 3:30am because when I left at 11pm I was getting milk
I must be pretty memorable. I was walking past this dude and he goes "There's the Scotch Girl." I have ZERO clue who he is, but I'm definitely the Scotch Girl.
so i went to the bathroom and my thong was on sideways... i guess that solves the mystery
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