it really sends the message that i like to impregnate mortal women and have them birth fantastic half man-half god infants.
i was so drunk that there were 2 of her, and i didn't know which one to fuck
omg a stripper jus od'd on stage.
hypothetically speaking is slutty or smart to buy plan b before we go on spring break so i dont have to get it in mexico
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
no. it doesnt count as road head if youre parked
Im in the STD packet for new students this year. And im going to be plastered tonight so be forewarned
Currently behind the bar at some asian place, pouring drinks for everyone with a snake around my neck
If drawing me a picture of his dick in draw something is flirting then he is doing it wrong.
She had sex in a public bathroom and slept on a couch in the dorm lobby. It's only Monday
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's gotten to a point that when guys say "I'm gonna cum" I've developed a habit of responding "dooo itttt" in a deep voice. #isthatweird
No, I'm just drunk and was excited cause a hot stranger bought me tacos.
You don't know being judged until its 7:30 in the morning and you're on 2 hours of sleep halfway between drunk and hungover wearing pajama pants at an international airport while saying how proud you are that you found the airport's bar immediately and how disappointed you are that it's closed
Just showed my drunk fiancé where I got circumcised, she's been crying for twenty minutes.
Let's drink lean at the 5 seconds of summer concert. Give the teens a glimpse into their future as dysfunctional adults holding desperately onto their youth. You in?
IT WAS A FUCKING ELEPHANT I SWESR!!!!!
Nathan, I haven't spoken to you in 12 years and it's 6am. Kindly fuck off.
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