the entire lecture hall sighed when the prof announced that there will be an exam on 4/20
Sitting on the floor in my kitchen eating taquitos. Being this drunk the next day has lost its allure post graduation.
She keeps referring to it as an "us" Either she is seriously mistaken on what fuck buddies are or she learned another meaning of the word "us"
No one intentionally makes bad decisions, just errors in judgement. You have your boyfriend I have a restraining order from universal studios. It's all relative
She asked the taxi driver to stop at the Texaco because she had to puke. She did then stumbled into the gas station and bought a 40.
Won't anyone wonder why I'm mute, bald, and wearing an eye patch?
Using our apartments online floor/space planner to see how many beer pong tables we can fit. Dont think they had this in mind when they put this thing online.
Probably not lol but were fitting as many as possible
It's a goat... but where the fuck did it come from?
I couldn't finish the episode and had to lay down because the snapple commercial with the mustache was blowing my mind
Bro if you were a bird I would puke in your mouth right now
She thinks you guys are the gods of the bathroom. If she runs past you naked, give me a heads up
I DONT HAVE THE SOCIAL SKILLS TO EXPLAIN THAT YOU DIED EATING MY PUSSY
I came so hard I literally levitated off the top of his dick. Gravity was no match for that orgasm!
Could someone explain to me why there were 40 individually wrapped burritos in the fridge when I woke up this morning?
you know it was a good night when you wake up with a medal around your neck
Randomize