So ignoring my calls doesnt work if you update your facebook a minute later.
I seriously need 2 stop fake jacking off in peoples faces at work...the I.T. Guy just showed me the security surveillance tapes.
My face is bruised from laying on the concrete. NO MORE VODKA!
HAPPY NEWYEARSM FAGTRON! GETTING HEAD IN TAXI I WIN
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There is a 15" subwoofer mounted inside our fridge. I've never been more proud of myself.
I am unable to type or say "unprotected, receptive anal sex" with a straight face. clearly, HIV was a poor research paper topic choice.
Why isn't there a sort by hair color option on Facebook? It would make stalking much easier.
Also I have uncooked pasta. I was hoping that could get cooked at your place. Don't ask about the circumstances that I came into ownership of uncooked pasta
This is that think about life weed. Thank god I'm in American lit this semester. I can actually write papers in this vat of introspective stoned.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So apparently after I spilled candle wax down the front of my pants, I went to the store, bought condoms, and passed them out to everyone at the bar.
I thought they were lying to me about the condoms, until I found the receipt in my pocket.
I just want to slap everyone in the face that's happy being sober. Loser.
Drunk me really does appreciate that sober me made a list of movies to watch when drunk it saves so much time
He's like a Lana del Rey song that took human form
Dinner at 5, shrooms at 10.
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
Randomize