Its about making memories worth repressing
On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
She made me put my jeans under her mattress so that I wouldn't leave in the morning while she was still sleeping. Apparently I just look like "that guy".
Lesbians. Lesbians everywhere.
But she tried her best to break my penis, so she has a few free passes with me
Dear female. Happy valentines day. If you have not had the pleasure of making love to me, please do not fret, I will get around to it soon enough. If you indeed have made love to me, then bravo, wasn't that grand! Perhaps we should do it again? Regardless, have a good day. This has been a public service announcement. Rock on.
I think the name vodka for a girl is amazing
Let me stew on this while im plucking my nipple hairs and showering.
omg he is no good in bed, bless his little heart and his big dick
Something about Sunday night screams phone sex
I can't believe you didn't come out. There was a duckling ON THE BAR!
Why so philosophical about cake and sex this morning?
I love the smell of your bedroom. It smells of a mixture of cherries, leather, and unrequited homosexual desire.
So, I found your eyebrow, someone glued it in between my eyebrows so I looked like I had a unibrow when I went to work...
You told me not to tell you found out you're pregnant..
Randomize