do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
you were mad bc i took longer then 2 minutes to finish
To justify your stumbling you just kept yelling 'it's the boat, not the drinks' We hadn't even left the dock yet....
The door to door salesmen do not expect you to be drunk at 3 in the afternoon
creepy tank top guy is at campus health. he's hitting on a girl recovering from a panic attack.
We hooked up with his aunt passed out next to us. It was just like old times.
1.) where are you? 2.) you making meatballs? 3.) Meatballs for sex?
I just ate a bag of doritos while taking a shower. I can now officially do anything
It's annoying. I only date people who are 6 foot 3, drug dealers, or 2 years older than me.
I'm gonna cougar town the shit out of that prom.
If you can find a Canadian Lesbian to have pity sex with me, let me know.
things I never thought I would say vol. 24 "Bagpipes just remind me that my relationship is over"
I totally almost forgot you fucked that guy. St. Patty's bar crawls always have a drawback.
in retrospect i think my mom tried to raise me gay
Cats are difficult to handle. Also they are impossible to baptize.
So this ukranian guy got angry and took his clothes off. Now he has my credit card and I can't find my keys.
Randomize
