so the chest pain/shortness of breath/overdose guy we just took to tm hospital is now running down market street from the police in a gown holding his iv.
carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
and that's how I found out my dad doesn't believe in towels... holiday magic.
all he has to do is look at me on new years and hes getting laid. thats how hot he is
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
please dont make me drink to the titanic soundtrack
someone made her a trophy at 4 in the morning and presented it to her in the bathtub
I think my multiple attempts of taking his life, no matter how unintentional they were, has put a damper on our friendship
Well I'm 2 for 2 with the absinthe, I just woke up in some random car behind the bar
It is way too early in the summer for me to be coming into work still drunk.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
You called me to pick you up from the bar at 9:00. When we drove over the speed bumps you put your hands in the air and pretended you were on a roller coaster.
Showed up 15 minutes late and curtsied when I entered the door if that puts perspective to how my first day is going
for once I'd like a one night stand where I don't meet the guys mom or wife in the morning
I just woke up butt-naked in bed with a guy I've never seen..I reached into my bag next to the bed to get my phone and found a bag of shrooms, a handle of vodka, and 600 dollars that I've never seen. what do I do
enjoy it.
you never know when your going to find a surprise from me in your bed...it keeps you on your toes.
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