New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
i just saw a homeless guy running after a pigeon, catch it and put it in his jacket pocket. I'm not sure if the bird is now his pet or dinner!
Omg. Well, welcome to Oakland...
I don't know where your sunglasses are, I was too preoccupied with girls not old enough to drive past midnight.
just fyi, hangover + ice skates = really bad idea
He made sure to throw up on the Mexico side of the border while we were in line at the check point. Then finished by screaming you an have it back. You can have it all back.
You then began crawling around in the grass with a magnifying class saying you were searching for the magic school bus.
we tried to steal a tractor last night. you should have come out.
My Yoga instructor is playing the music from 'Requiem for a Dream' it makes me very reluctant to put my ass in the air
I always hoped that one day I'd have a sex position named in my honor.
How many band members does it take to become The Band Slut? I think I might be dangerously close
making my breakfast out of the pot brownies we made last night. Safe to say it's time to go grocery shopping.
Speaking of, what are you doing next weekend? I'm going to a rope bondage seminar and may need a partner if my date bails.
I mean I'm sad it didn't work out but tbh he he can't unlick my booty hole or unbreak his headboard... He won't forget my name ever
I noticed while having sex on Friday that I have great endurance. CrossFit works.
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
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