Deffinety need to stop having sex on the beach just took a dump and it was mostly sand
I wish Facebook had filters like: Ivy League school, frat boy, straight, extremely wealthy, great in bed.. I would check all of them
There's people holding up abortion signs everywhere. I guess the people of Florida want you to remember you fucked up on Spring Break.
Also, I just saw a woman change into her stripper outfit in the bathroom at Target.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's drinking red wine in a margarita glass. He couldn't be more perfect for me.
I legit just said "vaginal access denied" then told him his password hint was "tequila shots"
Last time I sleep with a guy with a penchant to fragrance his dick. Every time I sit to pee, I get a whiff of Axe body spray.
I am wrecking havoc on the skinny girls by going home with the big one. She is taking me to see her dog now.
So topless strobe light beer pong turned into me rugby tackling a bitch to the ground.my tits will never forgive me for sacrificing their majesticness for responsibility
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just watched our fat male neighbor dibble a soccer ball across the lawn. It looked like Baywatch with diabetes
I may or may not have pissed on my floor last night
Welcome to 22
Did this whole conversation happen while you were shitting?
We're currently sharing pics of our cats. I can't wait to sit on her face.
ya I went to the grocery store literally just for cheese and condoms
Think I was still drunk when I woke up cause I went and bought a mandolin
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