Screwed.edu
do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
Thats about the time I should have known you would run around naked and try to make out with my sleeping mother
You drew a lightning bolt on your eye and stomach in eye liner and made me sing Poker face with you in harmonies. I never knew you were still a music major when you were drunk.
He got so drunk that he tried hitting on a girl using nothing but his Samuel L. Jackson soundboard application on his Iphone
I'm done being subtle here. MOVE INTO MY EXTRA BEDROOM SO WE CAN FUCK WHENEVER AND NOT HAVE TO WORRY ABOUT FINDING PEOPLE TO HAVE CASUAL SEX WITH.
you live like 200 miles from me and I have two years of school left
goddamnit stop pointing out all the flaws in my plan
My dog got laid yesterday. Some lady came over with her husky to breed. He did it like a champ. I was so proud
The bottle of Wild Turkey is empty and there is a pile of wet cement in the garage. What happened?
If you're funny as hell and have a mustache, odds are I'm probably gonna fuck you
ever since I turned 21 the mother-daughter bonding sessions always end with whiskey and my little pony. I don't know why, it's just a thing that happens
I HAVE DISCOVERED LONDON AND IT FILLS ME WITH JOY
His family, without saying anything, started a game of quarters the moment the drinks arrived. I love them. If only I didn't hate him so much.
Look, his dick is so good at being a dick that it makes me see God. And I don't even believe in God.
she just punched him in the balls in front of everyone and yelled "YOU SEE WHAT YOU MADE ME DO"
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