CONFIRMATION: i wiki searched it and Justin Bieber is 15 not 13. so i dont feel like as much of a pedofile now....
how do we leave politely?
Tell them I'm going into labor. I will spill a beer and tell them m water broke.
I actually had to roll up my long sleeves to masturbate. I hate the winter
i no longer even have beer goggles. i'm pretty sure i blacked out and had beer lasik.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
your drunk ass trust falled a guy double fisting bud limes and as a result your head bounced off the patio table. So that might explain the stitches on the back of your head.
Also, not pregnant! Way to go uterus! Good job on being a team player!
he screamed PILLOW FIGHT and hit branden in the head with a pillow that had a fifth of vodka in it. then he asked why he wasnt laughing
Nothing shouts "I'm single" like a thousand needlepoint pillows.
Of course I fucked him. He's a professional beat boxer, his entire job is to do complicated shit with his tongue.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have never appreciated strippers so much. Ma'am, you are an artist
The amount of times I have been emergency drunk in the past 72 hours is staggering
he came to me for relationship advice and we ended up fucking in my backseat
Idk you're asking me for advice on dating bro, after I told you I got a convicts number today.
ALL I WANT IN MY MOUTH IS A GLORIOUS COCK SMOTHERED IN CHOCOLATE. DICK AND CHOCOLATE; IS IT TOO MUCH FOR A GIRL TO ASK FOR?!
He just fucked me into paralysis. can't feel my hands or face.
Randomize