She just sent me a txt where every word ended in "zzz", with about a hundred "!!!" and called herself "juicezzz". I need back up.
Arguably, the best part was cockblocking those squirrels.
I think he just gave me the 'I used to sleep with your sister' discount
Remember how I haven't seen my step sister in like 7 years? Pretty sure I just made out with her...
Someone just bought me a one liter long island and call me maybe is on. I'm going to die
Only sluts go out in this weather carpe diem boys
Indeed. Apparently I called my sisters and told them I wouldn't get arrested because it's not a real sword.
He just grabbed my boob and justified it by saying "I just wanna feel your heart beat"
Glad to know I rate above a cabbage on the parenting scale.
Hi, my name is Ashslay and I'll be your designated shitshow.
One minute we were ordering sandwhiches. The next hes peeing in a trash can yelling at kids about how tv made him this way
I'm not snubbing your weed I just had a really important rack of ribs to get home to
Nothing showshows the government the middle finger more than spending your tax refund on drugs
now acid just makes me think of crab ragoon
suburban family judging/laughing at us after Jenna just pulled two flasks out of her boot on the subway
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