They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
no homo or anything but the way you were dancing with that girl gave me a boner
Sarah Palin is going to have a show on the discovery channel...Can I get a moment of silence for knowledge?
Most eventful shower ever. Jacked off, peed and puked in there.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
His thanks his mom for not having an abortion at his wedding toast. I love frat weddings.
She tried to sleep on the front steps of her salon so she wouldn't be late for work and these people put her in a cab to my house. She is nothing if not responsible. Can u imagine her boss finding her there this morning?
Employee of the year! :)
She's like an enigma, wrapped in a riddle, tossed in miller light, inside a question. Nobody can explain a Heather.
Had a guy spin me around at the bar, kiss me then say "oh shit you're not who I thought you were" and then walk away.
I still owe him the card with all the sperm paper cutouts falling out like glitter saying " sorry you can't hold your load. Better luck next time "
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm covered in glow paint and I can't find my shirt. So, successful night
his ex girlfriend sent him a pic of her naked in the bathtub so I sent her a pic of me sucking his dick
HIS DICK IS SO AWESOME DUDE. 15/10 SURPRISE
if i hadn't ended our catfight by hugging you one of us might be dead right now
Makes hanging out interesting when she lights you on fire just to roll ontop of you to 'put you out'.
his mom walked in while he was eating me out. and my vag was facing the door. luckily his face was in it.
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