Kicked off drink for Jesus month by puking in my mouth while talking to my priest...real cool
Just got a citation from campus security for an "accordion disturbance."
He jizzed my face. I had to ask for a washcloth. He ran his underwear under the water and handed them to me. Not so romantic.
it turns out jennifers body is not good to beat off to. yeah its megan fox but when she pukes up blood = goodbye boner
I cant talk about it right now or let you guess, but its something you and i would do. Kinda like that time we had the case of beer and went bowling
You hooked up with minors in a golf cart?
when he was about to finish he told me to avert my eyes and keep my lady parts away. chivalry isnt dead.
Look. You've gotta stop making this about you, and make it about my vagina.
I'd feel sorry for him and his injury but it's an inconvenience for my vagina
He made me cum 4 times, we high fived afterwards and then I proceeded to tell him about this guy I'm dating whilst I made him a bacon sandwich. I think we've finally mastered being friends with benefits.
Now the circle is complete. Just interviewed a guy who was a higher up member of the team I worked for in my job before this place
Everyone was soo nice and genuine.. Then again it coulda just been the drugs.
Hoping to get a pic of me on the tractor with an erection for you one of these days.
Her mom came down to the basement and took shots with us. She's now passed out in a wheel barrow. This party got weird
I cant believe you made me read bad furry sexts
You ever fart so hard it made you cum a little? A "friend of mine" wanted to know.
Randomize
