In the car with my brother. His CD went from 2pac to Taylor Swift. I'm concerned. It wasn't a mistake, he knows all the words.
I'm giving you permission to use the abortion money to pay for your DUI.
He' s half Black and half Italian, I finally asked...this penis maybe one for the records.
You just kept rubbing her head and repeating "I really like your head, I want your head..." over and over for like 10 minutes straight... And she didnt even stop you.
Are you still at the party or did I leave?
on a brighter note, the strip club found my atm card
She literally crushed my balls between her butt cheeks. It was both the greatest and worst thing ever. Dancers are awesome.
This dude was wearing a "Plan B- One Step" backpack. I wonder how many more I have to buy until I get mine??
The good news is the house is clean, the bad news is someone redecorated the bonus room by spray painting "free willy" on the wall in honor of the girl who passed out in there last night.
Actually, you don't want to see me.. reached an all time low drinking kahlua out of the bottle concealed in a macdonalds bag
I WISH WE COULD PLAY THE DRINKING GAME TOGETHER AND THEN BANG FOR AMERICA.
Actually here it's more "lie around naked in a dark room" weather.
some people waaaaait a lifetime for a hookuppp like this some people seeeearch forever for that one special handjobbb
There's no sexy way to moan the name Ernest. Or Ernie. This relationship is fucked
Got my client divorced finally. He was even awarded the cat ashes. Yep I went to law school for this.
Randomize
