My gyno actually laughed when I told her about his penis size.
the quote on the bathroom wall was "stop reading this and focus on peeing" and i realized i'd peed on the seat.
apparently the officer said last night, "son, why don't you do yourself a favor and spread your legs so you don't keep vomiting on them". why can't I remember those nights?!
You deserve yourself a blunt and a build a bear.
I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
You need to get here now. Before they realize I'm not puerto rican.
Nope, I'm sticking to passive aggressive punishments. Like mismatching his socks and cumming on his leather couch. OCD is so wonderful.
I haven't seen her in ages, how is she?
Well I woke up next to her this morning so I guess I would say she could be doing better
I told him not to mix beer with his Dr. Pepper...his reply was "i'm a grown ass man i'll do what i want". Judging by the sounds coming out of the bathroom he regrets not listening to me.
I'm pretty sure I said "this might be the last time I'm in here" but then I took his pants off so that's a mixed message
some dude just accurately guessed my height and bra size.. that is cup AND inches around. creepy, yet impressive
I wanna say I regret bonging a beer while having sex with Mike, but it helped me get thru it.
So high, just applauded for a magic trick on Hulu.
And I hope you're not misinterpreting us fucking as me trying to win you back. The sex is good and girls have needs.
Randomize
