my boyfriend just named your boyfriend's penis.
Remind me to tell you about the dream where im a fighting a super hero whose only weakness is sunkist.
we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
Dude, you posted a cap of a porn to survey if it looked like me. That's pretty certifiably creepy.
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
Dont ask, hes out back rolling around in the yard freaking out. literally just had a 15 minute conversation, only word i could make out was "yellow"
Our funnel is on top of our neighbors roof.
The last thing I remember was wearing a sombrero and trying to do cartwheels in the club
You did one successfully. Then smashed into the wall
Did u know it's unconstitutional to turn down a shot during 4th of July celebrations.. Rest now dear liver
Pedi-lyte stocked
When our dicks touched he made a lightsaber noise.
He's drunk and I'm pain-killer high and we're about to watch fireworks at disney world. It's gonna be fucking magical
thankfully we both ride of shamed home together on razor scooters in dresses because we stopped for breakfast sandwiches too
I'm high. I apologize for that last sentence
I just want to be like "i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it"
You start to question your morals when you wake up at 430 and there's three people naked...that you don't no
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