I haven't seen him in over a year. He asked me to his prom over myspace. Is he fucking serious?
Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
I would ask why there is a chair tied to the door of the fridge.. but I am not sure anyone knows the answer.
You don't care if I shave my legs, but you insist I be conscious for sex. Whatever. I really think your priorities are out of whack.
WHY IS IT FROWNED UPON THE DRESS UP IN CAT COSTUMES AND SIT OUTSIDE OF BARS WITH A BOX OF WINE I THOUGHT THIS WAS AMERICA
We're taking a shot every time Landon Donovan takes a shot. It's clever, sort of.
I am laying in your bed and just found a bottle of wine under your pillow ...should have married you...
how come you came home with "Amanda owns this" written on your forhead
We're doing a team debriefing of Saturday night in group text right now. As 75% of the female presence at that party we saw some shit.
My uber driver just told me I smell like fun...still drunk at 7 am
only i would get off to receiving death threats online
He still want's to kick my ass for fucking his sister, probably a bad idea to leave the bar with his ex...
He punched me in the face while giving him road head, because he was driving stick. I shit you not.
I snuck a teenager into a club last nite, I felt like such a criminal. It was Awsome
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