i went to toss her salad and she had a toilet paper clinger on one of the hairs
i dont know whats so great about being respectable.
I had a dream once that juice was flowing out of my kitchen faucet
My roomate just said the he would "tap dat" to the 13 out of control girl on maury. Im finding a new place in the morning.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just saw a british exchange student take a flyer for free dental care. Yes.
Just found the bucket list I wrote when I was high...somehow I dont think "jello swimming pool" is gonna happen.
It's one of those mornings when I woke up thinking that i really shouldn't have hooked up with my ex boyfriend's girlfriend just to prove a point.
ASS. GYMANSTICS. OLYMPICS. NOW!!!
The best part about drinking boxed wine is you can blow up the bag and use it as a pillow
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We've only been here for 15 hours and our names are already on 2 separate police reports. We've also been given our "final warning" by the cops and hotel management.
She's licking the whiskey out of the carpet. I think we may be soulmates.
his first act of 2015 was getting stabbed
Is it sad or funny that I just bought two pregnancy test at the dollar store to give away to people on New Year's Eve while driving for Uber.
day drinking didnt prepare me for this..
He’s only in town today and our afternoon sex sesh kept getting interrupted by the neighbor’s kid yelling and screaming in the pool
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