Should I be offended if he asked if he could use saran wrap to eat me out?
I want someone to please me without me having to show him steps 1 through 5
Dude. He only had one testicle. It was like his whole package was a Muppet Show character coming at me.
All you kept saying was "my dick ALWAYS causes problems".
Last I saw him was around 10 this morning. He was passed out on the porch with his head under the barbeque cover and there were cups of orange juice around him as well as loose tobacco spread everywhere. Good luck getting a hold of him.
Do me a favor? If you get with him, please lick his abs. Someone has too they're just too beautiful not to.
Might I also add after my boss threw up in the garbage can and yelled puking rally, he dougied, then told me I wasn't about that life.
I think I just wanna go buy some jack at the liquor store, come home, take my pants off, and not give a shit about stuff
We BOTH lost our virginities there. It's basically a landmark.
He thought you were kidding about me peeing on my ex...and then I was like "that was one time"
I feel like cursing someone's first born child right now. Like I wanna maleficent some bitch.
Remember that time you puked in the middle of wendy's?
Yeah, why?
The staff still remembers me for cleaning it up. Thanks for the free frosty and fries
I cannot believe all 4 of us had sex at the same time, in the same bed... And it didn't turn into a foursome..
I'm having to shit out rocks
Just found out a shooting happened in our parking lot while it was closed this morning. So thaaaaaaaaats fun.
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